Baby Wise

So, it' s just a day after Christmas, and not that I'm all about using other people's gifts, but Becky got the gift of a book from her sister - who is also expecting. She sent us the book titled, On Becoming Baby Wise by Ezzo and Bucknam.

While I'm not a fast reader, I've so far been really impressed with the content of the preface and chapter one. Despite the fact that the book has few if no Christian connections whatsoever, it seems to be postured to how I think about children, family and raising children.

First of all, since I've never been a Dad before in my life, I have no idea what it's like to be a dad. I have some ideas, and I have my experiences of being a son and seeing other parents parent, and really that's about it. I feel like my dad and my mom were both exceptional at what they did and continue to do as my parents. I love them and respect them so much, but in this day and age, I'm concerned about my own ability to parent, to say nothing of how to be a Dad.

I guess in some ways I think I have it easier, since I'm having a son, but then again not. Beck and I have talked - did talk about before we knew the answer to the boy/girl question: "If we have a girl, she'll learn more girl things - from her mom and if we have a boy, he'll learn more boy things from me." There's just some things that genders can teach themselves.

So in looking at Baby Wise, I'm at first challenged and moved at the need to think about how important it is to be the parent, and not the friend. Ezzo and Bucknam point out that a child becoming your friend is a good long term goal - one that's set way out in the future - well past the age of adolescence. They say that, "time and experience are prerequisites for building any friendship" and that "children enter the world with neither" time or experience.

I think my desire points to wanting to be a perfect dad, not because I want to be perfect for my sake, but because I don't want my mistakes to be my son's later in life faults. But I also think that's where I need to just trust in God and to look to God the Father as my example. I figure the more I get to know Him, the more I'll understand what He's going to teach me directly and what He's going to teach me from him indirectly.