Eating... it's so difficult

Ok, so I'm not sure whey Elijah has such a hard time eating, but then again it's probably my fault - really. We know that Elijah has clinical acid reflux and we know that he's into eating about as much as I am. He also has the same stature and build I do. He's a little guy. Having said that I have decided not to be frustrated with his not wanting to eat.. or shall I say his acid reflux.

I just feel bad for him because I know that the acid reflux isn't good for his esophagus and that being as little as he is, he needs all the calories we can get into him. He's not lethargic or unhappy. On the contrary, he's a very happy baby, smiles a lot and enjoys playing with his toys and with other babies.

I just hope that he is able to grow out of his acid reflux, esp. as he starts walking, which he hasn't quite done yet, though he does stand at the table and walk himself around that. By all accounts (from what the checkers and grandmas in the malls tell me) - it won't be long before he's toddling himself about everywhere - 'wireless', and completely self-propelled.

I guess I'll see what tomorrow brings. Today we had "Country Ham" for breakfast - with gravy... the leftovers from the 4oz bottle he didn't want to take. Blue couldn't even persuade him.

Being sick

No one likes being sick, and I have to say that in this case I'm very glad it's me.

I've recently caught the flu and while I don't like it, knowing how I feel makes me glad I'm the one who has it instead of anyone else in the family - especially Eli.  At first I thought I had enough chest congestion to warrant a pnemonia, but after a chest x-ray that was ruled out.  My biggest worry was that I had somehow given whatever I was sick from to Eli.  Knowing I felt border-line sick, I'd been refraining from kissing his pudgy little cheeks or even from changing his diapers.   Once I knew it wasn't a pnemonia, and that it was the flu, I felt better - but also knew that my distance from Eli would have to remain - if not increase.

Not being able to hold him and touch him, and cradle him, sooth him or coo back at him, or sing to him (for fear I'd breathe on him), or play with him - was hard.  I know he doesn't share real words yet, and I know we can't play catch or hide-and-seek (let alone peek-a-boo), but there's more to our relationship than those things - it's me loving him, just because he is, no other reason.

I looked at him from a distance and he'd look at me and all the while I wished I could help him understand what was going on, "Daddy can't hold you little buddy - he's sick and it's because I love you (and Mommy) that I can't hold you or hug on you."

One things for sure - I was definitely very motivated to get better and now I am, and while I didn't like being ill, I'm glad it was me and not him - he can't even communicate in intelligible words or gestures to tell me where it hurts.

God thanks for keeping him and Becky healthy and for healing and making me well again.

On the plane little guy

GeoTagged, [N35.80656, E83.99121]

So we got on a plane for the first time today. Mommy made sure everything was packed just right. My bottles, extra clothes, burp cloths and pasifiers are all in there. I've never been on a plane before, let alone go on a boat! And whats more is that I get to see my Nonnie and Poppop soon too.

Elijah fell asleep a little bit after Beck got done feeding him his 7:30 bottle. He lately seems to like to talk aloymt right before going to sleep. The one thing I hadn't thought about was the change in air pressure affecting his ears, but so far, at a little over halfway through the flight, he's fast asleep in Becks arms and doing very well. I hope he can stay asleep through the deplaneing (is that a word? Becky says it isn't).

Well I'm very excited to finally be on vacation. I asked Becky if she was excited, and she said, "yes, but I'll be even more excited and relaxed once we're on the plane and in the air".

I'm definitely try to enjoy every moment of this vacation, since I'm taking it with the people I'd want to be on vacation with the most- my family.

Please fall asleep little one

GeoTagged, [N35.93698, E83.74987]

So it's been a while since I posted I know, but I guess you could say that life has gotten pretty busy with little e around now. I've tried to sooty him several times, Becky's taken him and he's even in his favorite rocker and he's still fighting sleep. I don't get it. He has a clean diaper and he ate all of his meal prior.

I know kids don't come with instructions, but they all need rest at some point.

Today's the day...

Ok, so we're here in the hospital in Knoxville, and we've been here all night - though we're not in active labor yet.  Some friends just came in from their jobs to be here for the day and I know that them just being here helps encourage her.

I'm excited and thinking, "This is how this goes - ok, one moment at a time."  Beck's got her epidural in already.

I'll remember that we came in the night before early and they were able to start us on some softener.  We spent the night off and on trying to get some sleep.  Beck struggled to get some rest with her IV inserted and the baby monitors on and then that we 'woke up' this morning to our OB coming in and checking on us.

One of the nurses already said that they think she thinks the baby has hair.  I don't know what to expect, and yet I have so many expectations.  I'm nervous about if I'll be a good Dad.  Will I say the right things?  Will these things all be a blur to me?  I'm nervous, but not shaking.  Beck's nervous and shacking, but not afraid.  We're just not sure how the next few hours will go.  

We'll just see how it goes.  Time: 12:26pm EST.

So it comes down to the last few details the things that while don't have to be done, can be done, and as long as we're waiting - will be done.

Things like:

• laundering all of his new clothes
• folding all his new clothes
  
• putting all those clothes away in his dresser
• unpacking (or should I say unpackaging) all the wonderful gifts people have given us
• writing and sending all the thank you cards for the wonderful gifts people have given
• putting together some of those gifts (and yes they all have instructions)
• vacuuming and dusting his room
• cleaning all the bathrooms for when family and friends stop by
• getting the Germ-X opened
• setting up his Pack-N-Play for when his niece comes to visit
• purchasing last minute things we figured out we still need
• unwrapping packages of diapers and putting them near the changing tables
• organizing his closet
• attend one last shower
• clean the whole rest of the house
• get all the baby bottles/passies and other kitchen-type items stored somewhere in the kitchen
• creating his electronic and snail-mail birth announcements
• finding a pediatrician
• filling out last minute paper work
• getting over-night bags packed and placed in the car
• you get the point...

There seems like lots to do, and really most of the stuff above is really all done - which I'm glad for and many people have said, "Oh, don't worry about that stuff, it's not important." And while I'm given to agree with them, it's stuff that I can do, and well, he's not here yet, and I have 'nothing' else to do, so I thought, I'll use my time now, so that these things don't 'bother' me later once he is here.

On the flip-side much of it is very exciting and helps to make the whole thing of him coming soon - more real. Having the pack'n'play in our room now - before he's really here, has really helped to change the environment I find myself in normally - there's going to be one sweet little guy sleeping nearby - and right over there - that's where that'll be.

I'm very excited and lots of people continue to ask, "Is he here yet." No, not yet, but sooner rather than later, but not yet. It seems like so many (including myself) are in a 'hurry' to see him and yet we have seen him and am glad for him to come - in his time and in the time that God's appointed for him to come. It will be any day now and while the waiting may be inconvenient, I will wait. Patiently.

Working and waiting...

...patiently.

Beck and I have been overhwhelming blessed by the wonderful outpouring of all the showers that we've been given.  I didn't begin to think that there could be so much stuff - and all of it so baby, some of it I'm only beginning to understand, and Little E's not even here yet!

We're just under three weeks out from our due date, and Little E's niece came  in to the world on the 15th of this month, happy and ready to meet the world!  We're eagerly anticipating Little E's arrival and each day I'm thinking of things to do to get ready for him - things I just haven't done yet, but nothing that necessarily has to be done.  I think that's called nesting and I guess contrary to popular belief, it's not limited to the mom.

I have a coat closet that I want to clean out and arrange.  I want to re-arrange our extra storage area - since we just used some of it to store some things from my folks and now it's a bit more unorganized.  I want to clean the upstairs area, and the downstairs bathroom still needs to be cleaned really well, especially since after Baby comes, so do lots of people.  I need to clean out the inside of our car, and the outside of the car.  I have a list of addresses I need to finish compiling to send out our announcements. 

Now understand, I'm not stressed about any of these things getting done, it would just lend me a greater piece of mind if those things were done.  Of course, with us  being just under three weeks out - he could come at any time, and I'm sure I'll be thinking I didn't get 'such and such' done.  Something tells me it'll be ok.